Growing up I always wanted to be a world famous actress, but mainly a singer. I have always had a huge passion for music! I got my inspiration from watching musicals like The Sound of Music, Mary Poppins, and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. I was completely obsessed with them...to the point where I would act out every single line and prance around our house pretending I was Maria, Mary or Truly Scrumptious. I just thought I had this killer voice and someone was going to find me one day! I was going make it big in Hollywood, be discovered, become famous and get my first big break!
So to start out...I begged my mother to put me in the Charlotte Children's Choir around the age of 9. It was a place where I could funnel the inner singer in me. In youth plays at church... I made sure I was the main actress and I definitely made sure that I had the main solo part. I watched Star Search every Saturday morning when I was growing up to scout out my competition and as time went on...when my discovery as a singer was looking slim to none...I dreamed of trying out for American Idol. I truly believed I could actually make it big doing that!
So as the years went on I eventually sang in the church choir and on praise teams here and there...but I began to wonder why I would never get the lead solo parts and why I wasn't being discovered. Well...truth is...I sounded OK as a back up singer, and I can actually carry a tune....but all in all...I ain't no Sandy Patty, that's for sure!
So why did God give me such a passion for music? Why did God give me a love for singing if I am not that good like I had always thought?
and then....it all made since to me the other night.
My fussy little boy was growing so anxious and would not go to sleep. I tried everything and nothing would soothe him. As I was becoming increasingly impatient, and anxious myself I sat down in his little wooden rocker in the nursery in the pitch black dark and just started to belt out the words to him of the song, "Silent Night". I had tried everything else so I figured let me just go this route. So there I was...singing, and rocking. About half way through the second verse of the song I realized I myself was somewhat calm and soothed, and I was lost so beautifully in the words. I then happened to 1ook down and my precious little one was in fact sleeping in heavenly peace. That's when I felt the Lord telling me....this is why I gave you a tune and a passion to sing. To soothe your child.
I just smiled in that quiet dark room with my little one snoring so sweetly and cuddled up against my chest. Even though I may not have the voice of Sandy Patty or Julie Andrews...it was peaceful enough to calm his anxious spirit and to soothe him right to sleep.
So needless to say...I finally got what I had wanted all these years.
I got my first big break....I have been discovered :)